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I'm sorry this was so longwinded and not really an answer to your questions. God knows the big picture. There's a reason so many Utahns are on anti depressants and anti anxiety meds. Don't forget too that IF you are successful in turning the lights on and deconverting her, the family would resent you the rest of their lives. I expected to find this sisterhood of wives that would comfort, uplift, and laugh with one another.
Your comment is SO spot on in my experience. Why is it up to the wife or girlfriend to make it work and face being lonely forever. I just feel relieved that there are others of you out there in the same boat as me. Did he get kicked out of the church for marrying you.